About Baby Language

It is your job as a parent to teach your child the difference between acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Getting your child to behave the way you would like them to behave is not as hard as you think. Learning takes time and several weeks will go by when working on good behavior before you see a change. It will be hard, but try not to get frustrated if you don’t see results right away.

Discipline and punishment are not the same thing. Discipline is a whole system of teaching based on a good relationship, praise and instruction for the child to encourage good behavior. Punishment is negative. It is an unpleasant consequence for doing or not doing something. Effective discipline should take place all the time. Not just when children misbehave. Children will probably change their behavior when they feel encouraged and valued, not shamed and humiliated. When children feel good about themselves and cherish the relationship with their parents, they are more likely to listen and behave well.

I’ve been potty training toddlers for the past thirty years and have witnessed firsthand what approaches and techniques work best. I have also counseled hundreds of parents along the way and conducted extensive research in order to learn what pediatricians, child therapists, and other experts advise.

Parents cannot avoid trouble all the time. Your child will test your limits. It is a way for your child to find out if they can really trust you. They need to find out if you will really do what you said you would do if they did not listen. When your child sees the natural consequences of their actions, they experience the direct results of their choices. When you use this method, do not rescue them and resist the urge to lecture. Your child will learn best if they learn by themselves and therefore cannot blame you for the consequences.

Even with these precautions a toddler may still get into trouble with choking. If your toddler is still coughing, breathing and crying, you should not interfere, however if they have been coughing forcibly for more than two to three minutes, then you need to call 911. If they become silent and are struggling for breath then it is time to start rescue efforts.

Sometimes it is not always easy to think of logical consequences, especially in the heat of the moment. You can try withholding privileges. Never take away anything they truly need like a meal. Think of something they really like and follow through.

Then there are time-outs. This should be used as a last resort. They are good if you need to break the action such as hitting a sibling. Choose a good time-out spot that is boring with no distractions. A good rule of thumb is your child time in time-out can equal their age. If your child does not go there willingly then carry them there. If they do not stay then stand behind them and gently but firmly hold them by the shoulders or hold them in your lap and explain to them that they are having a time-out. Once they are sitting quietly set the timer, if they start fussing then restart the timer. When the time is up, help them find a positive activity. If you need to discuss the behavior wait a few minutes before doing so.

Resource Author Francisco R. Higueras
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